Focus for the Next 12 Months

For my Happiness Project, each month has a specific focus and a goal for what I want to do for each thing. I want to make the most of every month, so I have made them into broad categories with specific goals that fall under each thing. to make the month as productive as possible.

Here is my plan:

April: Physical

My goal for this month is to focus on exercise and feeling better physically.
I will get more sleep, make better eating choices, and workout every day!
This also includes cleaning up my life, organizing my closet and getting rid of things I don't need in order to clear my space and my mind.
Getting more sleep means looking into sleep studies and research and finding the "best" way to sleep in order to sleep through the night.

May: Memories

Since I am going to South Africa this month, I am making it all about making memories. I will take a picture every single day of the month. I will put together an online photo book from my pictures from 2013, and start one from the beginning of 2014.
I also want to start creating a smash book of random things that I like during this month.
This month's goals are also going to be focused on doing new things and crossing things off my bucket list that I made last summer and haven't put a dent in it.

June: Family

This month will be spent mostly at home with my parents and little brother. I plan to spend some time traveling to Grand Island and Ogden to see my sets of grandparents that don't live in Beatrice. I want to spend a couple days with each set of grandparents, because last year made me very aware that they won't be around forever and I can't take advantage of them.
I also plan to spend a couple days taking Luke on trips to do some of the fun summer stuff.
This month I also want to figure out my family tree and trace it back as far as I can.

July: Attitude
This is the month that I will be gone for Annual Training for two weeks. Military days can get really long, but it is all about attitude. My goal for this month is to overall smile and not stop.
This also includes not complaining when it comes to things that I have to do. Not comparing my day to other peoples day and seeing whose is worse.
Complaining is one of the things that I tend to do more than I notice, so I am going to make it a goal to not complain and to just keep smiling. I also want to start talking to people that I normally wouldn't talk to, whether it is within my unit or in the community.
This is the time that I am going to start a laugh journal. One of the speakers that I have listened to at a leadership conference said to write down all of the things that make you laugh and keep them in a journal of stories. This is a good way to keep your memories, but also remember the good times that you had laughing.

August: Time
Augusts focus is to make time for the things I enjoy in life. This is the month that I want to be able to read as much as I can, workout, take pictures, edit photos, lay in bed and watch movies, and spend time playing computer games.
My problem is that when I really enjoy doing something, I often feel guilty for doing these things before I do more productive things that I should be doing.
I also want to find a new hobby. Something that I will be able to enjoy for many years to come as well as something that is fun and I can include my family and friends.
This month will also be focused on using my blog as much as I can.

September: Work Hard
Because I don't currently have a job, I don't know exactly what this is going to consist of as of yet. I am planning on trying to go to Reclass school for the military or Warriors Leadership Course for the military. This would mean working hard towards graduating and putting effort into those things.
If I don't go to reclass school, it would mean working towards things to put on my resume such as working with the FRG, honor guard, or another volunteer project that I decide to get involved with.

October: Money
Money is a struggle for many people's happiness. Many have found that the happiest people are in fact not the people with all the money. While people with money can be happy, it is not always a direct correlation.
My goal this month is to figure out a savings plan to put some money away. But also to splurge on some of the things that I want to do or buy.
This month is going to be interesting

November: Be Grateful. 
This is the month to create a grateful journal. This is where you record the really big things that you are thankful for. I am doing it in the month of November because of the Days of thankfulness that many of my friends do every day all the way to Thanksgiving.
I want to take this month to make sure that the people in my life know that I am grateful for them, and my goal is to reach out to some of the friends that I don't seem to talk to as much as I would like to. I want to make sure that over the month I contact at least 15 friends or family members that I don't get to talk to enough.

December: Other Peoples Happiness
Many of the things I have read say that If you can make other people happy, you will be happy in return. I want to spend this month ringing bells, working with the food pantry or the wish list. Working at a shelter or doing other holiday things. This sounds really cliche because a lot of people only volunteer during the holiday season, but I also think it is a very good way to follow up a month of gratefulness.
Also with Christmas gifts, sometimes giving is better than receiving. I love Christmas because I love finding the perfect gift for my parents, my grandma, or my little brother. I will continue to do this, but this year I want to make sure that I focus on things they would actually use compared to things I think they would enjoy.

January: Mindfulness
This is the month that I want to focus on mediation and focusing on how I am spending the minutes of my day. Oftentimes I wasted time doing things that I don't need to do.
This month will most likely involve deleting a lot of my apps on my phone, watching how much time I spend messing around on pinterest or social media.
I want to spend a couple minutes mediating or doing yoga each day to relax and refocus my mind. This is going to be the month of productiveness.

February: Love
Of Course, I wouldn't be following the calendar if February didn't have anything to do with love. Valentine's day is often the focal point of February. This is the month that I am going to try to spend time focusing on how I talk to others. How I express my feelings for other people.
This is also going to be another month of expressing it to my friends and family.

March: Putting it all together
As it is in the book, The Happiness Project, the last month is trying to be "perfectly happy" The focus is to put together everything for the ultimate level of happiness. This month is not about being perfect, but not giving up. It is also about seeing which things work to make you happy because each person is slightly different with what makes them happy.


These are just the brief description of each month. There will be more things added to the project as I do more research and more reading about each topic. This is just the minimum over view!

If anyone wants to join me in their own happiness journey, Feel Free! I am excited to see what all happens in the next year!!

Let me know what you think!
Throughout my project I am going to post a question of the day with each post! please comment on the blog, my facebook link, simply send me a message, or talk to me in person, but I would love to put it all together and possibly publish some of the great feedback that I get from this project.

Question of the Day: Which month do you think will cause the happiness the most throughout the year? What other ideas would you add to your own Happiness Project if YOU were doing it!

Let Me Know!!

13 Commandments and the "Secrets of Adulthood"

Setting up My Happiness Project.

Okay, so if you missed the last blog you should check it out!
The last few days I have been doing some research trying to figure out the specific things that make people happy. I have come up with a list and tried separating them into months that correspond with the events within that month.

I will start my entire plan on April 1st and end it on March 31st of next year. The goal is to spend an entire year focusing on the different aspects that make you happy, then taking the last month to try and apply all of them, or the ones that really worked for you.

In the book, she creates the 12 commandments. These are set up for when she can't figure out what is making her do something or for when she is struggling the most. These are also things to look at when figuring out what to do each month. Each thing can go back to one of her commandments in some way. This is great for when you just don't want to do anything.

I made my own commandments, and took a few from her list because they seem to fit.

1. Be Me.
2. Happiness depends on me.
3. Stop waiting for happiness.
4. Get it done!
5. People love me, no matter what.
6. Lighten up and laugh it out
7. Don't keep tabs on people.
8. Enjoy what you are doing/ live in the moment
9. Let it go.
10. when it doubt, smile.
11. Don't over think things.
12. Be flexible with change.
13. And courtesy of my AIT sergeant. When you can't do anything else.
    Drink Water.

Now, those are kind of the things that are set in stone. Things I either need to improve on, but also things that I need to remember when I start to struggle.

She also has the "Secrets of Adulthood" These are a handful of things that kind of sum up a lot of things in one statement. They are things that people don't always want to admit, but oftentimes are things that hold very true in times of need.

Here is the list I came up with.

1. She who dies with the best memories, wins.
2. People don't pay as much attention as you think they do.
3. It is okay to ask for help.
4. You don't have to be good at everything.
5. You don't have to DO everything.
6. You don't have to like everyone, but you should be nice to everyone.
7. Love your body, it's the only one that you will get.
8. Learning never stops.
9. When everything else seems to fail, laugh it off.
10. Life lessons are repeated until you learn how to do them.
11. Time heals everything.
12. People wait all week for Friday, all year for Summer, and all of life for happiness.
13. Objects don't bring happiness. People bring happiness. Memories bring happiness. Success brings happiness.
14. Sometimes, it is okay to eat dessert before your meal.
15. Awesome things will happen today, if you choose not to be miserable.
16. Sometimes, you just need to pull your big girl panties up and deal with it.

.

Now, I do realize how cliche some of these can be. Actually, most of them are bad cliches that you hear your grandparents tell you or things you read on fortune cookies. All of those things that you used to laugh at when you were younger, but as you grow up, things start to make sense.

I really like these. It kind of sums up all of life in 16 phrases. In every situation, at least one of them will apply and help you find hope in the problem that you are having.


So here I am, getting ready for April 1st. Wish me luck.

My question for today is..? 
   What is your secret to adulthood or your cliche phrase that helps make each and every day better?
 Or what did one of your family members used to say to help make you  feel better, or give you hope/courage to make it through the day.

Happiness

  I just finished reading a book called The Happiness Project: Why I Spent A Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean my Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun by Gretchen Rubin.

    The book is an overall research project about what it takes to be happy, what makes you happy and what you can do to make yourself happier. She has an overall resolution for each month, and a couple small goals that fit in to each of them. One month, her overall goal is to boost her energy. For that month, she tracks the things that she does, such as gets more sleep, exercises regularly, organize, and just plain act more energetic. They say that you feel the way you act, and you act the way you feel. Each month she goes through what works and what doesn't. (GREAT! book if you have the time to read it. Ironically, I think I found this in a stack of books that my mom had once started, but never finished.) 

When I googled "Happiness" and looked at the images, there were pictures of smiley faces, quotes about smiling more and feeling happy, but to me, a yellow face with black eyes and mouth doesn't really define happiness. Webster's dictionary defines happiness as "The state of being happy, or an experience that makes you happy." Below it there was also "a state of well being or contentment." That didn't really help me either. 

Here is My Goal:

  I want to do something similar. I am going to start on April 1st, and I will be tracking my progress on my blog! I want FEEDBACK! In the next 2 weeks, I am going to be putting together the background for each month and what I am going to be doing for those months. 

Here is my question for the day? 

Simply, What is happiness to you? What makes you happy? What are the things that make you smile? 

Answer it on Facebook, in the comments or shoot me an email at Elylyons2013@gmail.com. Please. I am really interested to hear what people have to say as I start to shape my thoughts about this project. 

Every Woman is Beautiful the Way they Are.

    I am probably the worst one about this. I know that I sit at a relatively healthy weight for my height, even though according to Rush University Medical Center's website, for someone who is 5'3" I am suppose to weigh 104-127. This seems ridiculous to me. According to the BMI, I am slightly overweight. I am okay with this.

     This week in my English class we discussed eating disorders and how apparently fat has "become a feminist issue." No one associated being fat as a problem that men commonly have.
I argue this, mostly because I have seen many men who are worried about their health, or who are dieting, exercising, and just making healthier choices when it comes to their lifestyle. My dad is a great example. First he started exercising.. Then came the juicing, then the smoothies. I am not sure how much weight he has actually lost, but he looks great! He still says he wants to lose a couple more pounds, but who doesn't want to lose weight?
    For our second paper we are writing about "Building Awareness." I am righting about eating disorders in females and males, but with a focus on the media's role in eating disorders. I spent my Friday afternoon was spent watching a documentary found on Netflix called America the Beautiful. It interviewed different people that work in the media such as Seventeen Magazine Editor, US Weekly editor, and some famous fashion photographers.  It also followed a young girl. She was tall for her age and she didn't feel like she really fit in at school. Everyone called her giraffe, until one day when she was at the park, someone told her that she could be a model. Her mom supported this idea because she was a model herself when she was younger. At age 12, Gerren Taylor started modeling. This meant that she was missing precious education to model in NYC and LA for New York Fashion Week. While she had a pretty successful couple of years, it quickly went down hill. At 15, she was told that her hips were too big and she was "obese." At 6 ft tall, probably 120 lbs, sitting at a size 4, the super modeling business considered her obese.   Her school principal had a lot to say about the idea of her becoming a model. She made a comment about how crazy it was that they are now trying to make the perfect, ideal body to be that of a 12 year old. "We are so focused on a beauty that is unattainable. It is so unhealthy and destructive."
    This disgusted me. They are telling kids that they are too fat. All of these media ads and fashion weeks are telling every average person that they are not pretty enough and not skinny enough. Models as young as 15 reported thinking about getting breast enhancement or enlargement.
     There was a study done in Fiji in 1995-1999. It was a very traditional culture in a way that if they were bigger, it meant the village was well taken care of. Being fat was beautiful. In 1995, 3% of the teenage girl population in one area said they had ever in their life induced vomiting as a way to control their weight.
     In 1995, the researchers introduced television to the area. Three short years later, in 1998, researchers went back to this area to talk to the girls. 15% of girls around age 17 had said that they had induced vomiting to control their weight. Many of them made comments like "I am heavy and I often feel depressed because of this." or "I really want to lose weight."
    In three short years, television had taken a country where big is beautiful and they were all proud of their bodies, to a place where everyone was dieting and trying to be skinny.
    Television has been available for the home since the late 1920's. Imagine what television has done to our country in the last 80-90 years.
    The United States holds approximately 5% of the worlds population. In 2012, the Census recorded about 313.9 million people. The world population was estimated to exceed 7 billion in March of 2012.  That being said, the United States sees 40% of the worlds advertisements. All of these advertisements tell little girls and teenagers how they are suppose to look. When fashion trends change, so do advertisements. Michael Levine, a Hollywood publicist, was interviewed in America The Beautiful and said, "Victoria Secrets has saturated the perfect. It has diminished the ability to love the ordinarily beautiful." The Seventeen magazine editor said, "I am not running a non profit organization. It is about profit. I print what sells."
    One study done reported that girls as young as 5 were dieting. It also showed that they were more worried about getting fat than they were about getting cancer or losing a parent.

     All of this information made me question, "Is America really this superficial?" How can we be so focused on our weight that things like our health and family don't matter anymore. One mom that had lost her daughter to an eating disorder said, "Mom's are perfect in a kids eyes. So when kids hear their mom say they hate a certain part of their body, kids quickly realize that they have the same body as their mom's do. This causes them to hate that part of their body at a young age"

     I know this is a lot of facts, and it is a little overwhelming, but when I woke up this morning, and I looked in the mirror in the bathroom. I did my daily routine of pulling my shirt up and looking at my stomach in the mirror, but I didn't feel fat anymore. I know that I still need to get in better shape and lose a couple pounds for the military standards, but it wasn't overwhelming to the point of me thinking "I am so fat."
    One of my pinterest motivation pins says, "You are not fat. You have fat. You're weight does not define you." Marilyn Monroe said, "To all of you girls who think you're fat because you're not a size zero. You're the beautiful ones, it's society who's ugly."
     This gave me a lot of motivation to love who I am for me, not for what I look like. Sure, dressing up with make-up and your hair done is fun and looks good, but it shouldn't be a necessity for you to think you are beautiful.

You, whoever is reading this. You are beautiful. Society is UGLY and corrupt. 

If you are struggling with an eating disorder, or need help, find the help you need. Trust in a friend, a doctor, but most importantly, if you have them, your mother. I know mine would be there for me if I ever need her to and I am sure yours will too if you call and tell her that you are struggling. Please, get the help that you need because you are beautiful and you deserve better for yourself.

Weigh In Wednesday!

Another Weigh in Wednesday is here, even though I haven't been posting them most weeks! I have something to write about this week!

At the highest point over Christmas break, I was weighing in at 160. WAYY too high for me. It was because there was a million sweets and goodies for me to eat and my grandma tends to be someone who pushes food from the kitchen, to your plate, to your mouth. Easy way to put on some pounds.

I have been working out regularly since I got back from Christmas break, but there wasn't a lot of success because I was constantly rewarding myself for working out with food like cookies, ice cream and chocolate.

I was also struggling with working at McDonalds and trying to not eat there.

I was averaging a weigh in of about 156 since I started working out.

This week, on Saturday. I started counting my calories before I eat anything on my plate. I figure out exactly how many calories are on my plate, and then I eat until I am full. When I am done I subtract what is still on my plate from my calorie count.

I have also been drinking shakes with the Body by Vi Nutritional Powder in them for 2 meals a day. I am still making sure that I am getting enough calories for my body, but I have found that I am not that hungry until it is time for me to eat again.

I have started eating snacks in between my meals. about 2 1/2 hours after I eat, which has been great.

After doing all of this.

Since Saturday...

I have lost...

Two and a Half Pounds!!

What a great start to this!

I have a lot more motivation to keep going than I did just a few short weeks ago!